As are many of you, I’m receiving Facebook “Friendversaries” notices I’m having with people whom I’ve been FB friends with for a number of years. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad I’m friends with so many people, but I often wonder if Facebook is something that’s a good thing, or a bad thing.

First, I’m definitely a late bloomer regarding technology and social media. Come to think of it, I wasn’t even a bloomer at all when our district handed out laptops, or iMacs, or whatever they were called when they were issued to us for use in our classrooms. Turning it on was an adventure in frustration for me, and I still feel that with other devices I use, especially, just when I get used to something, and then Facebook, Samsung, Google, Sirius XM, or whatever I’ve become comfortable with, changes.

But slowly and begrudgingly, I’ve learned a few things, included in the many, from which I wish I would have stayed away. Facebook is one of those. (I do Zoom, but only when someone sets it up and sends me a one click link to enter, I do not tweet or X or whatever it is called this week, I do not Instagram, I’ve reluctantly learned how to text, but for the life of me I know I can call someone and have a conversation in far less time than it takes me to one-finger text.)

As a substitute teacher, now, I’m not a fan of cell phone allowance in classrooms, mainly because Chromebooks, or the like, are accessible to students. I’m not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I can usually figure out that there are some students who are not using their phones for educational purposes, but for communication purposes “on company time.” It’s hard to discipline that scenario, but I’m not comfortable seeing something I don’t feel is right, happen with no consequence. No disrespect to the schools that allow the use of cell phones in classrooms, it’s just my archaic nature and philosophy, but lately, Fortunately, I’m seeing more and more districts/teachers turning to a more controlled cell phone policy for use in the classroom.

Facebook is a little different entity to figure out. First, Sally and I have both been hacked once at different times, and once I had my wallet stolen and in all those situations, we had to do the entire credit cards cancellation, then re-up accounts, then contact those who had our old credit card numbers on file, and it was a total pain in the gluteus maximus. So, I’m very cautious, some may say scared to the hilt, to pass along too much information with social media accounts. I did, though, join Facebook, and I enjoy connecting with friends and relatives living long, and short distances from us, seeing their kids and grandkids grow and celebrate special days, events, achievements, accomplishments, hearing happy news, and sad news too, etc., through my computer and/or cell phone screens. It’s quick, and easy (sometimes) to share whatever information with ones we do not see much, or maybe even do, in our everyday lives.

I especially enjoy seeing what former students and athletes are doing in their lives, both in their jobs and careers, and in their adult lives (married? children? successes? etc.) Some of them have reached the half-century mark in their life, and most of them were nine, ten, eleven or twelve when I had them in classrooms. I did have some in High School as I taught at JHS for three years, and I did coach Modified and High School sports, so they’d be a little older. Many of them have kids, some have grandkids, some have sadly passed away way too young, but the proudest thing I can say is that most became wonderful, productive, responsible people. I often said (but not to my supervisors or administrators), that I didn’t teach reading, writing, or any of the core subjects or unified arts, I taught students, and I often told those students/athletes that twenty five years after we spent time together, not many people would remember what kind of student or player they were, before they remembered what kind of person they were. The core subjects, unified arts, and athletic mechanics and skills were very important, but life skills and work habits learned were more important. I made life skills and work habits my biggest priorities, and judging what I’ve seen often on Facebook, I feel I made the right call.

I’ve never been a fan of seeing what people had for dinner the previous night, [unless it was part of a traditional sacrifice to Jobu (movie Major League)] during playoff baseball time, or a special meal that had a special story with it, and sometimes I feel there might be too much information shared on Facebook, but that’s my feeling and I’m okay with others expressing themselves as is their right. I hate politics (the often hurtful and nasty bombardment of mudslinging comments by so many on both sides of the aisle, or issue) on Facebook, but again, that’s me. It’s like Henny Youngman going to the doctor and saying that his arm hurt when he lifted it, and the doctor telling him not to lift it. If something bothers me on Facebook, I don’t have to read or follow it, there’s an X button I can hit (and often do), or a mouse I can use to scroll past it. Everyone has the right to their opinion, and everyone has their right to disagree and move past it, but no one deserves to be nasty.

I also hate that Facebook, and other social media, are used to cheat, steal, and slander other people. The world has enough weapons of destruction. Technology shouldn’t be one of them. Technology also takes away personal contact/conversation from communication. People who need, or want, to say something, that might be sensitive or honest to another, have easy ways out of that by using messaging, texting, or email, and sometimes we need to speak face to face. (Yes, I know I’m naïve.)

My biggest fear/concern of Facebook is the use of it by children, especially young ones, who offer too much information and are duped, or worse, by people in the world who can hurt them. I made it my personal policy never to accept a friend request from any child, relatives included, who hadn’t reached their senior year of school. I’d accept friend requests from them (if they still wanted), after becoming seniors, in case they needed/wanted a reference for a job, or the next step in their education.

So, we began this narrative wondering , is Facebook, and other social media, good, or bad? The answer to both questions is, yes, it is, and no, it isn’t. It all depends on how it’s used, and that is all up to the user.

So, in the meantime, cherish your Facebook “Friendiversaries” that you’ll share on Facebook/Social Medias, but always remember, be as respectful, kind, and safe as can be when using it.