A few weeks ago, the VFTB submitted a narrative to this publication regarding the, then, upcoming announcements that were to be made regarding the Diocese of Buffalo’s plan to “renew” parishes, by merging parishes and/or closing churches. My position in that essay of a few weeks ago has not changed, but some of what I have heard since that article was published, has created a few questions/feelings in my mind.

First of all, on Tuesday, September 10th, I watched and listened to the official announcement of what was going to happen in the Diocese of Buffalo within the next eight months. First, and these are my observations and I might be totally incorrect in my perceptions, both Bishop Fisher, and Father Zielenieski, appeared, and spoke, with, what I perceived as, a bit of trepidation. I can understand this because, and I ask for forgiveness now (Sorry God and Mom), that whatever they said, they would be “damned if they said one thing,” and/or “damned if they said something else.” The Bishop spoke of his understanding of what people of the diocese were feeling as three parishes from where he lived before priesthood were forced to close, so he knew what people here were going through. He did say that it is a sad day, but also an exciting day to be able to be a part of the church moving forward. I wasn’t sure some people were thinking about how exciting this information they were receiving excited them right at that moment.

Prior to the press conference, there was a post on Facebook explaining the decisions made in one Parish family, which happened to be the one of which I am a member. One of the initial proposals had one particular church’s closing in our family, and a different one remaining open. In the final proposal announced on the 10th, that was changed and the one closing will now remain open, and the one designated to stay open at first will now be closing. There was no real detailed explanation why that aspect of the initial plan was changed to close a different church and keep the other one open. Personally, I would have liked to have known if that change was influenced by parishioners or clergy. It won’t change how I feel, or my attitude to what I said in my column a few weeks ago, I would just like to know. I’d also like to know what will become of the cemetery operated by the church that is now closing, the cemetery where Sally’s and my marker has already been placed, and is ready for our arrival when our time comes?

This next item is not a question, but an observation that disappoints me somewhat. About ten years ago, the Diocese of Buffalo ran a Campaign called Upon this Rock. Many people pledged, or made, donations adding up to millions of dollars. Parishes were asking for more than some could give, but people answered the call, and most made good on their pledges and donations. A percentage of those donations stayed in the home parish, and many of those parishes used their percentages of donations to upgrade, repair, update technologically, and/or and beautify churches, many of those now being designated to close their doors forever within the next eight months.

The biggest sadness I have regarding all of this is that as rumors were flying around before the final announcement was made on which parishes and/or churches would be affected, some mentioned that “their” church, which was originally named to close, was now going to remain open and a different church would be closing. My sadness comes from some people almost cheering as if a referee overturned a call and took a winning touchdown away from one team and the other team won. It seemed like some people I heard talking were happy “their” church “won.” There was no winning in any of this. There was losing. We all lost. We all were, and are, affected. There shouldn’t have been any celebrations of victory, or elation, with any of the aspects of this situation before, or after, the announcements were made. There is, though, some consolation in all of this. In all my coaching experiences I have always preached that losses can teach you how to win. They can show you what you need to improve to get better, to find a way, to motivate you, to inspire you to move ahead.

It teaches all of us that we can learn more from losses than from victories, and if there is anything to celebrate from all this, it’s not that this is an exciting time in the church, but it is a time that can bring us all together to be more than just neighbors in faith, but instead be Sisters and Brothers in Faith. Maybe then we’ll remember that when a brother or sister is sad, we should be compassionate, give a hug, console, offer ourselves to our brother or sister, and try and comfort them, and assure them that all is going to be alright. We came together before the announcements were made as Catholic Neighbors in Faith. We need to turn from being neighbors in faith to being a true Family of Faith. Remember the words of Father John, from St. Michael Church in Independence, OH, who always reinforced the teaching that it isn’t the building that is the church, but the people who worship in it. He did this by saying three small words offered each time he said Mass, “Good Morning Church.” We are the church, a church family. I hope we can act like one.