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First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage, Then Comes...

June 17, 2013 - Liz Skoczylas
Since getting married 37 days ago, the most common question people have been asking us is, "How's married life going?" The second most common is, "When are you having kids?"

The answers: "We haven't killed each other yet" and "Not anytime soon."

I've heard this rumor that kids are expensive. Like, you have to keep them fed, and they grow kind of fast when they're little so they constantly need new clothes. And, if I'm being honest, there are times that I run out of dog food and so the dog eats a meal or two of treats before I manage to get around to buying a new bag. I'm pretty sure if I just fed a kid treats, that would be even more frowned upon than doing that with the dog.

Right now, Nick and I are adjusting to being a married couple. And, while I joke that "we haven't killed each other yet," I have to admit... I'm enjoying my role of being a wife. I love that we can enjoy each others company. I love that we can go out on a whim and not have to call anyone to babysit our dog. I love the peace and quiet we have most of the time in our home. And, I'm not looking to change that quite yet.

There's also the fact that we live in an apartment. Granted, it's a very nice apartment with two bedrooms, but it's not a place we are looking to start a family. For one, research shows that for children living in owned homes rather than rental units, math achievement scores are up to 9 percent higher, reading achievement is up to 7 percent higher and behavioral problems are 1 to 3 percent lower. (OSU Research Communications)

Then, it goes back to that "kids are expensive" thing. We are putting money away for a down payment on our first home. If we were to have a child right now, I'm guessing we would have to really dig into that fund, which would make it much longer until we would be able to own a home, and then we will have a kid with low reading and math scores and behavioral problems.

The bottom line is, Nick and I have priorities. At ages 26 and 30, we are still young. We want to be able to enjoy each other before adding another person to the mix. And, when we do decide to add to our little family, we want to make sure we are financially able to do so.

People keep telling us that we can't plan a "good time" to have kids. That may be true. All I know is that 37 days into our marriage is not a "good time" for us to have them.


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